How do I know when it's time to quit my job? I'm a successful VP with opportunities for growth ahead of me. My bank account is full but I feel empty inside. Everyone around me assumes I'm having an amazing time because I can buy whatever I want. Everything except my happiness. I dream about quitting my job and just taking some time for myself. Is that selfish?
Thanks for your guidance.
Cindy L, 6D
You have a responsibility to be 'selfish’. In card terms, your Saturn card is the Ace Hearts. Your long-term developmental task is to become more attentive to your inner child, to become self aware, to become more 'self-ish'.
Your personality blueprint as the Six of Diamonds involves the desire to be fair to everyone, to see others' perspectives, and possibly to care-take their feelings. I am glad you are in touch with your desire to quit.
You have several Fives and Sixes in your yearly spread this year. Fives indicate the desire for change and Sixes indicate destiny. So this change you feel like you want to make is coming at a time when you are aligning with your destiny.
Keep in mind, change is a process. Allow this to take some time. One reason this is difficult is that your old programming is putting the needs of others ahead of your own. Actually,
I have been struggling with letting go of a very toxic, controlling relationship in my life and need some guidance. My ex-husband (he of toxic and controlling fame from the sentence above) continues to verbally abuse me when he gets angry, which is often. To make matters worse, his verbal abuse often-times occurs in front of our two children. He struggles with alcohol abuse and anger issues and it has only escalated since our divorce. I try to keep things calm, but I don't feel like I can bring up any issue for fear he will unleash on me.
If it weren't for the children, I would try to avoid contact with him at all costs. Since we share custody, I feel that isn't an option, at least for the time being. I know I shouldn't feel sad when he says horrible things to me, but I do. It makes me worry that my children will grow up and think that is an OK thing to happen in a romantic relationship. To complicate everything, deep down in my heart, I struggle to let go of the hope he will one day do the work to make a change. The Two of Clubs in me wants to fix this and make us a happy family again....the other part of me wants to know how to let that motherfucker go. Help?
Nicole R., 2C
You are having a battle between the cards on either side of you: your super sensitive Moon card, the Seven of Spades, and the powerful mind card, the King of Clubs. Mind vs heart. Does that ring a bell?
It is clear that you know your own truth, and this has been the purpose of your obviously karmic relationship. (Karma just means you had some important work to do. Check out our blog and video on Karma here.)
He is obviously a very important player in your game of life, so begin by giving thanks to his higher self for agreeing to help you get this work set up. Stop gagging and just do it.
Remember, he is just playing his role. And try to remember that this experience was chosen by both of you, and your children, from a place of higher awareness and loving intention.
Think of him like homeopathic medicine. He is a dose of the opposite of what you want, which gives you a chance to choose.
When he unleashes his abusive rants upon you, seal yourself in a bubble of light. We will get to the part about you being a bad-ass in a moment, but the hurt he causes you is one of the surgical tools you have to dive deep into the pain. Part of having a Seven in your Moon position is about feeling pain and being sensitive. So...
ALL RELATIONSHIPS are a MIRROR
I've been reflecting on this (puns!) and seeing that the most important role of a parent is to reflect the child back to him or herself with as little distortion as possible! Yeah, right. Unless you were raised by Jesus, you have a distorted sense of self. And relationships are what we seek out to get a better reflection: one that feels right.
So this is most of our childhoods: parent holds up a mirror which is dented; convex in places, concave in others, and filled with smudges which black out parts of our reflection.
We stand before it, getting not only a distorted sense of who we are, (e.g. you are too messy, too curious, too angry, too happy, etc) and try with all our might to make the reflection look whole and balanced. (I shall be neat all the time, content, never angry, and careful instead of happy, e.g.) Thus is born the